Cisgender, but that’s not me.

I came across this new term the other day, and it wasn’t obvious to me, what it was all about. A cisgender person is someone who is happy with the gender they were born with/as. Sadly, I found this after coming across a post on Angels or Transliving International. A girl was talking about a friends partner, who had been the subject of abuse by a transgendered person, who she criticised as being cisphobic.

Abuse in any form, and in any direction is abhorrent to most of us, and from what I have read in other girls blogs, there are lots of support out there from cisgendered persons. At the moment, I can’t get my head round the fact, at all. We get so much help from non transgender/ non gender dysphoric friends,family and partners, that to pick on someone else’s partner is beyond belief.

My son split up from his first serious partner, (I think), and was a bit upset that we didn’t cut our ties with him too. We had built up a bond of our own, and you can’t change your affections just like that. Had we gone off the deep end, it could have looked like we were being homophobic from an outsider, who didn’t know the whole tail. We aren’t homophobic as I’ve said, but that doesn’t mean we’ll like every gay person we meet, (and we haven’t); so perhaps the above subject event was a one off fallout, but as I don’t know what was said by whom, etc. I don’t know that. The tone in which we say things can put a completely different slant on even a simple statement, and no doubt the writer of the post had taken this in to account.

Lets raise our glasses, to all those cisgender, transgender, and any other gender people we know, and be tolerant of, and blessed with, all our differences.

Love and hugs to you all, Anna, xxx


Introspection and Dolls

I was swapping comments with Tina, and I said “I don’t do introspection” – which doesn’t mean I haven’t done it in the past, or won’t do it in the future. I’m more into auditing at the moment – emotional and hard cash. Because I get very little en femme time (but more than some poor girls) I audit my purchases; is this ‘something’ going to give value for money when I’m only going to use it on a few 30 minute sessions a month? I’ve got a bit of my lovely dad in me – he was gentle, and very reluctant to spend money – but only a little of him, LoL. I sometimes wonder if the emotional hassles are worth it too – but so far I’ve always decided that it is. I may not be able to decide otherwise I suppose, seeing what I am – my head saying female, my body showing a male. HHHmmmm this looks like introspection to me – LoL.

We went to Kent to start the process of disposing mum’s belongings, now that she is in care. She has gross short term memory loss, and doesn’t know where she is most of the time, or what she did some hours ago. Anyway, I brought home some photos and negatives. In among the b&w pics was a photo of myself with a doll and my younger sister. If you have read some of my first posts, you’ll remember that I said I used to play with dolls, but stopped when people started making comments about it. I’m quite young here, 4 or so, and I think I played with dolls until I was 6 or 7. Just guessing! But I remember that it was the tone of the comments (you know how nasty older siblings can be sometimes), that put me off playing with dolls. I so adored babies, (and still do), when they came into our lives.

Anyway, I was so pleased finding the photo, because I remember being happy with dolls. It lends credence to my memories too, do you think? I have recently been wondering if I can find a small doll, as an ornament for my computer desk. Dolls keep making an appearance in my life, but they are always someone’s else’s. Perhaps at 60+ I’m a bit old to be hankering after dolls again – LoL. I like to think that perhaps there was a bit of tgirl in me all those years ago.